The following week another friend named Kate had a similar issue with yet another mother named Liz, she had met at school. After a few months, Liz had started to cool her friendship with Kate without any explanation. A few days later Josh mentioned how a family member had said some nasty things to him which were untrue. Josh could not comprehend how someone who is meant to be a member of his family could make such statements. “They really wanted to hurt me and I could not understand why they were saying such cruel things” he explained devastated.
My friends were at a loss as to the behaviour of the people in their lives.
I thought about my two friends and their need to find explanations for the actions of the people in their lives. The short answer to their queries is that there is no possibility of ever finding the real cause of other people’s behaviour.
Over the years I have learnt that situations occur and people behave in ways which are out of our control. The only aspect we can influence is our own reaction to the situation. You do not have the power to change others or the circumstances. So you have to learn to let go and change the way you react.
I have not mastered this fully but as the months and years go by I am getting better. We are only human and our first reaction is always emotional. Why did they say it? How could they do that? We try to process the situation and the emotions. However once the feelings settle, you have to make a conscious effort to let go of everything that upset you. Instead focus on the wonderful things that are happening in your life. It may be a little thing but if it brings a smile to your face then great. The world is not perfect but if we can find joy in the small moments, then our lives will be happier and more peaceful.
Have a wonderful and safe week and start paying attention to all the good parts of your life.