The relationships in your life influence you more than you can ever imagine as they affect your health, finances and your weight. You have relationships with your parents, siblings, friends, relatives, partners and work colleagues. Each group affects how you feel even though you may not realise it or want to admit it. Your partner for instance would have the greatest impact on your life, as you live with them and spend most of your ‘private’ time with them. Whereas a distant friend, would probably have the least impact on you as you see them occasionally and you have minimal emotional attachment to them.

You need your own little cheering squad in life and this may be your partner, parents, children or friends. Why do you need a cheering squad? They motivate you to do your best, be your best and help you live life to the fullest. Positive relationships pick you up when life is not going as expected and motivate you to push on and reach your goals. To show you what I am talking about, let us look at the opposite of a cheering squad, the ‘heckling’ squad. One type of person who would be part of the heckling squad is an abusive partner. Jenny for instance was in an abusive relationship with Paul. Her partner would continually put her down, threaten and taunt her on a daily basis. Over time her self-esteem and confidence would suffer and she would feel miserable, trapped and even scared. Jenny became depressed and her health started to be affected. This is an extreme example of a heckling squad and these types of people generally make you feel awful and bring you down.

Another example would be how a footy team would feel uncomfortable when they were playing on their opponent’s home ground. Few if any of their own supporters would be there and they could be heckled by their opposition's supporters. How well do you think they would play their game? Now imagine if the same footy team was playing on their home ground the following week and their fans cheered them on and encouraged them to win. How well do you think they would play? My guess would be that they would probably play better and even win their game.

In your life you need people around you to cheer you on, so that you can perform at your best and lead a fulfilling life. So look at your circle of relationships, do they cheer you on or put you down. Do they encourage you to follow your dreams or do they come up with reasons as to why you cannot succeed? Do they criticise you or praise you? Are you scared of them or do they make you feel safe? Do they make you feel good or bad? The final decision is up to you, as you decide who you want in your life. You can surround yourself with people who are supportive and positive or negative individuals who will make you feel low. The only one holding you back is yourself as you can leave bad relationships behind at any time. Go on, have your own cheering squad in life and enjoy the wonderful experiences that this world has to offer.

I have received more positive feedback regarding my book and I am overjoyed that others are able to use my exercises to help them. One reader mentioned how she had worked out her budget and is finally able to manage her finances. Remember it is never too late to change and improve your life.

Hope you have a great week and that you are moving closer to your dreams.

My workplace recently had a financial planner visit our premises to give staff advice regarding their superannuation. After going over my policy with Joe the financial planner, we started chatting about how life takes you in unexpected directions. He had initially started to study accounting and then changed to economics. Joe worked in various roles and is now employed by a superannuation company as a financial planner. While discussing our careers we both mentioned how we felt work life balance was important.

We both worked in finance related occupations but we choose sectors which were ‘family’ friendly. I had always wanted to be available for my family so I chose jobs which enabled me to spend time with my loved ones as well as have a career. I currently work as a Business Manager at a secondary college and this fits in perfectly with my family life.

It is funny how working out your superannuation, can make you reassess your life. Superannuation makes you think about questions such as how long you are expected to live and how much money you will need after your retirement. It can be a morbid subject but it is something we all need to consider. Thinking about your future also makes you consider how you live your life.

To help you work out your answers, ask yourself if you would be happy with the way you have lived your life, when your time is up.

Here are some points to consider:

Work life balance

I have heard the phrase, we are meant to work to live, not the other way around. A lot of people spend long hours at work and then collapse into bed each night. This pattern of behaviour will eventually affect the relationships around you (if you have any) and your health. There is no point in accumulating ‘nice’ things, a huge bank balance and then dying before you have a chance to spend or enjoy any of it. Look at your life and see if you are making the most of your life. If not, think about how you would like to live and the changes you can make to achieve what you want.

I understand that money is essential to live but there are ‘smart’ ways to grow your money such as through property investment. Leslie, a friend of mine, for instance used $10,000 of her savings as a deposit for an investment property. Twelve years later that same property has equity of over $250,000. Investing allows you to grow the money you save, without having to work long hours. There are many tools which can help you to start investing but the main thing to remember is to educate yourself, follow your gut instinct and set goals.

Be happy

Life is about experiencing all that the world has to offer. Work out what your dreams are and then follow them. Make a list of all the things you would like to do, places you would like to visit and then go for it. I have heard people refer to a ‘bucket list’ which is a list of things people want to do before they die. How about making and doing the things you love now?

Maintaining relationships

I have met people who are so busy pursuing ‘money’ that they neglect their family and friends. Over time the relationships slip away and they find themselves alone. When you are lying on your death bed, do you think the dollar bills are going to keep you company? In troubled times, it is your relationships with others which gives you the support you need. When you are celebrating a happy occasion, your friendships help you savour the moments even more. It is important to keep in touch with your friends and family or you may find yourself alone in the end.

It is funny how working on your superannuation can make you think about life. However it is better to do it while you are still healthy and able to act upon your dreams, rather than being close to death and having regrets.

Speaking of living your dreams, I have just received my new business cards and who knew a person could be so excited by a card. My dear friend Ella is a talented graphic designer and she has created them for me. The next step is tell the rest of the world about my book so if you have any ideas please email me. I have had positive feedback from people who have read my book and found it useful. I feel so honoured that each person has found it helpful and relevant to their own needs.

Until next week, take care of yourself and live your life to the fullest.

In fairy tales everyone lives happily ever after for instance the Princess rides off into the sunset with her Prince. Life however is a combination of a drama, comedy, tragedy and romance. Shakespeare said it best when he wrote:
 
“All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,”

You play the role of baby, child, adolescent, partner, and parent. However you can also play the role of heroine, seductress, victim and survivor. There is an endless list of characters that one person can play in a lifetime.

While you may play many parts in your life, one thing remains constant, everyone has problems. Remember Cinderella had trouble with her step-mother and two ugly step sisters. In life, things will happen which are out of your control, however you decide how you can react to it. You can get bitter and angry or you can try and look for the positive side and move on. Did you realise that you hold the power to decide which way you viewed the world? Your attitude will then determine whether you are happy or depressed and sad. We all have a choice and in the end the only person who will truly be affected is you.

My friend Jessie has a seventeen year old son named Caleb who chose to live with his father Ross about two years ago. At first Jessie was devastated and she felt a great loss and sadness at losing her son. Then after about a year of grieving, she stopped thinking about how she felt and reflected on how Caleb and her ex-husband must have felt. She realised that even though she missed her son, Caleb was now happily living with his father. Jessie realised that her ex-partner loved Caleb just as much as she did and that it was only fair that he also spend some time with Caleb. Ross and Caleb now had the opportunity to get to know each other before Caleb reached adulthood and left home. Jessie’s shift in thinking helped her to feel at peace and look at life more positively.

Life is full of surprises with unexpected twist and turns and the only aspect you can control is your reaction. You decide the ending to your story and whether it will be a comedy, thriller, tragedy, romance or drama. So what type of movie will you choose for your life?

I am still organising the promotion of my book and the feedback I have had so far has been great. It is being sold on Amazon, other online book stores and even e-bay. I am so excited that it is available worldwide as it means that I will be able to help more people. Hopefully the lessons I have learnt will help others find some of their own answers.

Have a great week and keep smiling.