Both parties in a relationship need to feel equal

When I am sometimes talking to people I feel like saying “You should read my book”. Of course, this can come off as being rude so I just listen quietly. The other day I was talking to an acquaintance and she mentioned that a few years ago, she was going to the US for a holiday and mentioned to her husband that she wanted to buy a particular brand of watch as it was cheaper overseas. Her husband said no, that it was not a good brand. Six months later her husband bought himself a watch with the exact same brand she wanted. When she confronted him about it, he could not understand why she was so upset. She told me that her husband had the belief that since he was the main breadwinner, he could buy whatever he wanted.

I was quite upset by this conversation. I knew she was not happy and her husband’s attitude was going to make her resent him in the long term. There was no equality in the relationship.

A strong partnership is allowing each person in the relationship to feel equal, this includes looking after money.  If you are unhappy with the way you are being treated, then have a conversation with your partner. Let them know how having to ask for money makes you feel. A solution may be for you to have your own bank account so that whenever your partner gets paid, a certain amount is automatically put into your account. This is your money and you can then do whatever you want with it. There is no need to ask permission to spend your money. This may empower you and stop you from feeling powerless.